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Thursday, December 11, 2014

About that special new Amazon "update" (malware download) for the Fire

I wanted the Washington Post removed - here is the transcript of the chat with the EIGHT (and couunting) transfers:



You are now connected to Amazon from Amazon.com
Me:The new Kindle Fire update sucks
Amazon:Welcome to Kindle Chat . I'm Sahishna. I'll be happy to assist you today.
Me:I do not want the Washington Post - I certainly do not want it to always be the first icon
I uninstalled it
apparently you forced it back on me
Is this MY device, or YOURS?
I do not want this ES thing
I certainly do not want it as my first or second icon - I can never find the apps I use or the book I am reading because you keep forcing things on me that I do not want
At this rate, I'll want a refund on the Fire and you can have it back
I am quite capable of deciding what I want on my device, and what is most important to me to use
Amazon:A member of our Amazon Appstore team will need to help you with this. Please hold while I transfer you. One of our Amazon Appstore Specialists will assist you shortly.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Sravya from Amazon.com
Me:And I see that Mayday no longer works - must be getting lots of complaints about where did this unknown app come from and how can I get rid of it, eh?
What an awful update
It isn't an update or upgrade - it was a malware download straight from Amazon
Sravya:Hello
Me:Maybe what I need to do is write a review on the Fire on your website and let people know that you will be deciding from now on what apps they want and what apps will be their first and second icons
and that we can't uninstall them
Sravya:Could you please be on hold while I transfer to kindle team
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Michelle from Amazon.com
Michelle:Hi Summer, my name Michelle.
Me:Hi Michelle, who are you going to transfer me to?
Michelle:I'm sorry that you've been transferred multiple times. No worries, I'll not transfer you to any one.
If I have got you correctly your Kindle fire doesn't have a Mayday button after the software of your Kindle has been updated, is that correct?
Me:This new update is not an update at all - it is a direct install of malware from Amazon
I do not want the Washington Post.
I removed it - you shoved it back on
It does not need to be the first icon since I DO NOT WANT IT.
I do not what this ES thing whatever it is.
I do not need it as the first or second icon
Michelle:I'm sorry what do you mean?
Me:I can no longer FIND the apps I actually use because they are buried under a half dozen thing you "gifted" me in this update
I want this Washington Post REMOVED permanently
I wnat the ES thing removed permanently
I want control of my device returned to me
I want to be able to find the apps I use frequently
Michelle:I'm sorry about this. Let me check for possible option that I can do for you.
Me:Not have them buried under three dozen things you forced on me
And by the way, no, Mayday does not work
Michelle:Are you referring to device "Giles"?
Me:yes
The one I am about to pack up and return to you since apparently it is YOUR device, not MINE
I've posted a one star review
And will be sure I let everyone I know in on who the new Fire REALLY belongs to
Michelle:Let's try to troubleshoot your Kindle to fix this Summer.
Do you have it with you right now?
Me:yes
Michelle:May I ask if you're physically located in US right now?
Me:seriously?
Are you one of those idiots who doesn't realize that NEW Mexico is in the US
Michelle:I've confirmed that your Kindle should have a mayday button.
Let's try a factory reset of your tablet, which can solve intermittent problems.
Because a factory reset will remove any content you've downloaded to your tablet, make sure to back up your personal content to your computer first. You'll be able to download your Amazon purchases from the Cloud after registering the tablet again.
Any in-app items may be lost during a factory reset. Please check with the app developer for more details on their in-app policies before completing a factory reset. If you have parental controls enabled on your tablet prior to the factory reset, you will need to turn them back on once the device is re-registered.
To reset your Fire Tablet:
1. Swipe down from the top of the screen, and then tap Settings.
2. Tap Device Options, and then tap Reset to Factory Defaults.
Me: oh no
do not
do NOT reset
shit
just get this damn Washington post off it
and this ES whatever it is
I uninstalled and they just come back
I'm not going to spend two days trying to get my apps back, losing my history, everything
Michelle:Since you can't find your apps, I need to transfer you to appstore department. Please stay connected.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Sami from Amazon.com
Sami:Hello, my name is Sami. I'm sorry about this. I'll be glad to help you.
Me:Is ther any way to get rid of your malware?
Amazon forced the Washington Post on me, I want it gone
I want this ES whatever it is gone
Sami:May I have your permission to place the chat on hold while I review your chat with Sahishna.
Me:I want to be able to find the apps I BOUGHT that I INSTALLED that I USE
fine
I'm sick of having nothing I want on the opening screen. I have to go to apps and DIG down to find the ones I want
Before this "update" I was fine
Sami:I understand that you are having trouble with finding the apps on the carousel .
Let me connect you to the appropriate team to assist you with this.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Swetha from Amazon.com
Swetha: Hello, my name is Swetha. I'll be glad to help you today.
Me:Hi there Swatha, you are my sixth transfer
I guess that answers my question right there
Swetha:I'm sorry for these multiple transfers.
Me:There is no way to remove these apps you forced on me with the latest update
just be honest and admit that you are going to force them on me
and I'll be honest in my one star review
Swetha:Please give me a moment while I review your previous conversation.
Me:and decide who to foist me on next, eh?
and I suppose if I allow a factory reset - I'll end up with NOTHING BUT the damn Washington Post
none of my history, none of my apps, none of my history
I get it
This is YOUR device, not mine
Amazon will now decide what I will see
so, does that make you Big Sister?
Swetha:In this case, A member of our App Store team will be the perfect person to help you with this. Let me connect you to a member of our App Store team. It will only take a moment.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Yousuf from Amazon.com
Yousuf:Hello, my name is Yousuf. I'm sorry about this. I'll be glad to help you.
Please be on hold I'll just transfer your chat to the appropriated team.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Amazon from Amazon.com
Amazon:Welcome to Kindle Chat . I'm Sahishna. I'll be happy to assist you today.
A member of our Amazon Appstore team will need to help you with this. Please hold while I transfer you. One of our Amazon Appstore Specialists will assist you shortly.
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Mahesh from Amazon.com
Mahesh: Hello, my name is Mahesh. I'll be glad to help you today.
Me:seven transfers, twice to the same department
Mahesh: May I please place you on hold for 1-2 minutes while I look in to this for you?
Me:Oh PUHLEEZE
Mahesh:I am seeing the multiple transfers and I understand how inconvenient it is.
I'm really sorry about the inconvenience Summer.
Me:No, I get it, I WILL have Washington Post and this other malware your forced on me.
Rest assured I will purchase a different tablet, and get rid of the Fire - which apparently belongs to Amazon, no matter what I might think
I would like a refund for the Fire and for all of my apps purchased in the app store
Mahesh: A member of our Kindle specialist team will be the perfect person to help you with this. Let me connect you to a member of our specialist team. It will only take a moment.
Me:All because I do not want the Washington Post
A Customer Service Associate will be with you in a moment.
You are now connected to Amazon from Amazon.com
Amazon:Welcome to Kindle Chat . I'm Sahishna. I'll be happy to assist you today.
Me:In the good old days we called this the run around
well, Sashina, how nice, I think I've already talked to you at least three times
Amazon:I apologize for the inconvenience caused.
Me:ROFLMAO
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